Arkansas Canoe Club Forums

I ran across this rant this morning and wanted to share it with yall. I had a "wtf???" moment within seconds of starting to read this.....and I thought the unibomber manifesto was wack!

http://www.canoekayaksafety.com" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

"It is, for certain people, a means to degrade, torture and kill: to make themselves feel superior; whereas 10 year old children can easily rescue themselves and others. "

"Unless you want to sell a rescue safety scam. And you think that torturing people to death, even young children, with expensive and deadly instruction is OK. Even fun."


yes, your all a bunch of sick'os. How dare you! HOW DARE YOU!

I have the same WTF mindset after reading this......maybe the writer was trying to be sarcastic or even funny - SURELY, this is not being written on a serious note............

Wow. I mean, WOW!!!

My thoughts were the same as Renee's, this must be a joke. So I took the time to read it all the way through, looking for the hints.... never found them.

Time to google it. "Tim Ingram Sponsons" was the ticket.

Found this: http://www.kayakforum.com/cgi-bin/Techn ... read/11653" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

and other stuff. I think the guy is for real. (I suspect someone close to him drowned.) He happens to be the "inventor" and holds one or more patents for sponsons for use on kayaks (and probably canoes). He believes his product (or one like it) should be mandated for canoes and kayaks, the same way we mandate seat belts and air bags for cars. He believes, truly believes, that because the ACA fights such laws and teaches other techniques, they are guilty of murder. There is talk of a lawsuit with ACA, but it is not clear to me who was going to sue who - did he threaten to sue ACA, or did they threaten a suit against him for slander due to being accused of murder and torture for profit? At least once, he wrote letters to local law enforcement when a drowning occurred, trying to get them to file murder charges against ACA or others.

There is an element of truth in what he says. For some applications, sponsons would make sense and be a great safety device. Think open water paddling. Even in a swamped boat you could still get about 1/2 of your body out of the water, greatly delaying the onset of hypothermia. Heck, maybe he's even got a point, maybe rental boats on open water should have them, in addition to PFD' and paddles. For some more wild reading and insights into his point of view, go here:
http://www.canoekayaksafety.com/conclusion.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

So, he has a few good points, but then he goes and jumps off the cliff. Those who don't agree because they don't want more laws, or because they want the right to choose their own boat outfitting, are murdering and torturing children.

He seems to overlook "details". Would the law apply to all kayaks? Would my creekboat have to have sponsons? If not, would I be breaking the law to paddle my creekboat on a lake? The list goes on...

I feel like I just took a tour in the insane asylum. It's really scary, because all these people were whispering all these crazy things, but every once in awhile someone said something I agreed with...

And WOW again – it gets even better. You’ll like this guy, as long as you’re the insightful type of person that knows we didn’t land on the moon, the world is flat, and the Holocaust didn’t’ happen. Apparently failure to win his arguments has stirred him further – from more recent (2009) e-mails or letters as posted on what appears to be his website:

Dear FBI: Re: Canoe and Kayak Murders and 9/11 Towers' Murders
I have contacted you numerous times during the G.W. Bush Administration regarding the deadly fraud (at least 100 dead Americans in canoes and kayaks annually: US Coast Guard BARD), perpetrated by the American Canoe Association.

The FBI can go to my website… This particular 9/11 webpage is sufficient evidence for you to pursue the deliberate endangerment and killing of American citizens both in canoes and kayaks, and 9/11.

Start with Rudy Giuliani, former mayor of NYC who destroyed the 9/11 crime scene, preventing the collection of the large quantities of thermite explosives from the ruins…
And arrest the head of the American Canoe Association, the organization that has effectively threatened the Boating Safety job positions at the US Coast Guard, in order to murder hundreds of citizens in canoes and kayaks. I have all of the evidence….

Help the new President before the destruction of America is complete. You cannot fix Wall Street without fixing Wall Street morality, that perpetrators like Rudy Giuliani and the American Canoe Association have used as a model to defraud Americans, and even murder them in large numbers. So complete is their, and accomplices, moral bankruptcy of America.

Please do your duty FBI. See this letter on "FBI Safety Warning for America" on http://www.sponsonguy.com" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;, just below the eleven (11) lines down.
Thank you, Tim Ingram
See my identity at the U.S. Patent Office in Washington
http://www.freepatentsonline.com/6343562.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Arrest Rudy Giuliani.
A 100 ton airliner impact is no serious threat, actually a relatively "tiny" impact compared to the structural strength of the towers, the strongest buildings possible: essentially 200 feet of steel/concrete beams in all directions, far stronger than the spire shapes (Chrysler, Empire State, Sears building etc.) Jet fuel burns at far too low a temperature to weaken steel. And of course WTC7 was 47 stories high, not hit by any plane, and collapsed perfectly, symmetrically, into its' own footprint, the signature collapse of any controlled demolition, like the twin towers next door containing nealy 3,000 screaming victims. Samples of thermite were obtained: the explosive cutting the steel girders in the neat cuts shown in hundreds of photos of the girders being quickly loaded onto trucks. The steel was not twisted, but neatly cut in handy lengths for quick disposal.
Notice Victim Edna Cintron waving for help, just before she is blown up by the Bush White House Cabal.

Arrest Pamela Dillon, American Canoe Association:
Pamela Dillon, Executive Director of the American Canoe Association, responsible for the agonizing deaths of nearly 2,000 canoe and kayak victims, just under the 3,000 of Al Qaeda and Osama bin Laden in the U.S. and Canada…

I can’t take it anymore. I’m rushing down to Rockport to see if the Rescue Clinic is still going on. Those people need killin’, maybe I can help…

Domain registration runs out on Jan. 7. Perhaps some enterprising people (or the ACA) could snag the address.
http://www.whois.net/whois/canoekayaksafety.com" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

His basic thinking is not bad. He may have even been sane in 1997.
http://www.wavelengthmagazine.com/1997/ ... float.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

But then again . . .
Here is this from http://www.boatbanter.com/showthread.php?t=14439" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

This is typically a huge can o' worms, but here goes.

Sponsons have some utility for activities such as fishing, but they are
essentially useless as a rescue device. They take several minutes to
install and inflate. Once installed, the added stability they create can
be extremely detrimental in rough water and surf, since it inhibits
leaning the boat into waves which is crucial to avoiding capsizing. They
are only usable on boats that have been specially outfitted to
accommodate them, so they cannot be shared within a group of paddlers.
They are WAY too expensive for what they are. If you really think you
have a use for them, you can make your own system from boat fenders and
inexpensive hardware available at your local marine supplier.

Whatever you do, don't allow yourself to be taken in by the lies and
"voodoo science" of that sick SOB Tim Ingram. It's obvious that he'll do
anything to make a buck, including exploiting the deaths of children.
According to him, all of us here are murderers and tantamount to Nazis
(I have some quotes from his last diatribe here if you want to see what
he's about). He doesn't deserve to profit from his disgusting behavior.

Learn to use a paddle float, but more importantly, learn to brace and
roll. Those skills are far more useful and valuable than any piece of
equipment.

I think it is time for me to head to the Buffalo.

Maybe I should make him a special foil hat!

LMAO

Seems like his energy would be better placed ranting at cell phone makers and carriers for all the people they kill each year because people are DWT (driving while talking/texting)...(e.g., air traffic controller talking to his girlfriend while mid-air crash occurs). That's not even considering all the radiation bombarding our brains while we use the things.

Yeah, Turbo...foil hats....more foil hats!

Notice how most new cell phones have no antenna's! That's because they use your head as an antenna. Think I'm making this up? Search it!

I still haven't located a large enough sheet of aluminum to do my big noggin. So until I do, I guess I'll play the roll bestowed on me by Motorola, and be a good antenna.

Just more proof that some people are educated BEYOND their intelligence. In this guys case WAY BEYOND.