Spring River

[bart]

I read in the paper today that the Spring will be highlighted, not necessarily in a positive light, Tuesday night on TruTv, 9:00 PM. Party Heat filmed a day on the river with the AGFC checking boaters for violations, and, by the article, they found a couple! Just thought I'd pass the news along, in case anyone would like to watch.

[Owl]

The town motto ain't "Party Hardy" for nothin'.

[Sir Kayakalot]

Thanks for the heads-up. Got it set to record.

Tommy

[David Mac]

If someone with satellite/cable could record and bring me a copy I'd appreciate it. It might make good for laughs or learning material at a chapter meeting.

[JBradley]

Although I do not condone any of these poopatraders activities, the intrusiveness of these water Nazis has led me to believe I will never float these frigid ,lascivious waters again.

[WoolyJR1]

I wanna know where some of those AGF officers who were going undercover had their lifevests....I didn't see any in some of their kayaks and they sure weren't wearing them.

[TC]

Will this help or hurt the economy in Fulton County? Would hate to see some of the outfitters go out of busness because of this.

[okieboater]

any chance of the video being posted where us Okies could see the deal?

[TC]

Sunday, Feb 28th @ 1:00pm TruTV

[SteveGabbard]

Classic quotes:

"You're more messed up than a turned over tacklebox"

"My boobs cost more than that (ticket)"

We looked good on National TV, too bad she didn't.

[Owl]

Here's a preview from the truTV website:

http://www.trutv.com/shows/party_heat/index.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[GutIt]

Thanks Owl.

I was wanting to see some of this.

[GutIt]

I told myself I wouldn’t, but yet here I am doing so just the same!

I haven’t seen the segment. I looked at the site to see if I could find it, but didn’t have any luck. And I need to see it for sure if I stand behind this post after viewing.

This place has become the most abhorrent, offensive, disgusting, repugnant, (and insert any like adjective here) destination I have ever had the extreme displeasure to visit. And it wasn’t always like that. At least during the “season”. And that includes the Elk and the Niangua.

I have seen some of the most pathetic displays of Human Behavior at the Spring as I have seen anywhere on the Planet. And I am a Merchant Seaman. I have seen the worst of the worst. I have been to the most seediest spots in the world and they behaved better than what I have seen at the Spring. Mostly because the bar owners would at some point just shoot everyone if it got that bad. And well they should.

In fact, I have seen law enforcement/medical turn out in riot gear to try to get a handle on the fighting, violence, and generally dangerous goings on. This isn't just a bust for having or even smoking a couple of J's. It is way beyond that. And they were fully prepared to use as much force as needed to restore some semblance of decency. Sawed-offs, gas, name it. They were probably scared to death to even have to respond to this insanity. Probably thanked God they lived through paddling patrol that day. I was sure scared to death being amongst it. This is on the river! The campgrounds are even worse. I don’t mind mentioning names. Many Islands is famous (infamous) for this. And they rent thousands of chrome boats every weekend. Maybe every day. From what I know they have the biggest fleet on the river.

Spring River Oaks isn’t any better. It is a matter of percentages because they don’t have the numbers, though their numbers are staggering. I stayed at Riverside one 4th July with some up and coming young kayakers. Thought we could get some practice on the basics. Young ladies, men, Moms, Dads, and unfortunately me and my wife. A fricking Swat Team from Memphis got arrested in their entirety by the sheriff dept. at the campground for fighting, drunken behavior, no telling what all that weekend. Between themselves, any nearby campers they thought looked at them wrong, whoever. I called Memphis to voice after this weekend and asked for them all to be terminated and charges be pursued. Every last fricking one of them, and there were about 15.

Water Nazis, huh? Well maybe. You turn out as a law enforcement and/or AGFC agent to this scene? Let me know what your “pucker factor’ might be. And how you hope to know the difference. And how glad you are to get home to your wife and kids. It is my opinion that they would enjoy their jobs way more, and do what they hope to do in the way of education and stewardship, and probably why they decided to pursue this avocation in the first place, if they didn’t have to respond to a violent life-threatening situation that involves riot control. And on the river.

This is a really nice stretch of water. The land owners are for the most part hateful, and for good reason. In fact most of them enable this behavior. The outfitters are out of control. If the whole lot got shut down it would be for the best and I wouldn’t lose one night’s sleep. It is a self-perpetuating situation.

Whew! I have no problem with nudity, drinking, having fun, maybe even what may be considered illegal consumption. There is a place and thankfully those that I am addressing with this opinion know where the “line” is and how to have fun without being a threat to anyone else. Even though I may not know exactly know where the “line” is? I know it isn’t where I have described. Which is all the way down this run. I have a huge problem with violence, stupidity, and destruction when it comes to being on our waterways and participating in the activities that are so important to the vast majority of us. Flame as you will, but I have seen it, and there is nothing that will convince me otherwise.

Man, I need to just get out and maybe do some soul-searching or something!

I know that I am probably going to be sorry for posting this!

[Shark Attack]

Like Terry said. I agree.

[FarPastGone]

I have worked on the Spring the last two summers, teaching Boy Scouts kayaking and then taking them down the Spring. Of the 20-30 trips I have taken kids down the river on there have been maybe 4-5 incidents. Most the time it is just rednecks cusing at them. Most the crazies can missed if you are on kind of early and off kind of early. Plus the N Fork of the Spring has a campsite on it that I doubt gets very rowdy since it is just sort of out between a bunch of pastures.

As for some of the stuff I have seen on the Spring over the weekend without any of the kids. Lots of female anatomy, saw a dude get hit so hard I thought he instantly died but he just got knocked out for a while, the stage on river left had girl on girl (I'll stop right there) contests, drunks getting sucked under a log on river right just below Spring River Oaks, and countless other forms of debauchery.

On the 4th of July during the summer of 2008 a canoe got pinned at the bottom of "big" rapid on the run, can't remember the name, and actually made for a badass little boof ledge.

However, the greatest tribute to America, ever, period, occured on the Spring River during the 4th of July weekend of 2008. The stage on river left was surrounded by tons of people, DJ up on stage, lots of girls. So the guy throwing the party comes out and says alright everyone this is the last song of the day. Then he says something like "lets not forget what today is about, this man right here (points to a dude) lost his brother in Fajullah, don't tell me this war doesn't hit close to home when we are fighting it in our backyard." I was like it's Fallujah, at this point I thought, oh god, what are these rednecks going to do. They then begin to play "God Bless the USA" by Lee Greenwood to a crowd of the most patriotic drunk rednecks. The guy throwing the party gets on stage waving a huge American flag, chick in a rebel flag bikini showing her pride uniquely, a dude holds up a "Show Me Your Boobs" sign, a guy in an American flag speedo (drunk dude in at least his 60s) gets up on stage as well and starts fist pumping the all mighty s**t out of the song, rednecks in canoes crying with tears of pride, and to cap it off a chick that is super drunk is being "patriotic" standing up in her canoe falls and faceplants into another canoe splitting her face open.

My buddy Allen and I were just left speachless at the greatest display of patriotism ever seen by the planet. I failed to capture the moment when American speedo was on stage, but I was able to capture a picture of part of the ceremony to immortalize it forever.