How do you stay married with kids and paddle??

[turboturtle]

( I am a gifted annoyer, I can teach you

Got that part right!

[Gery]

The reason I got a boat instead of a wife is that the boat only tries to kill me when I paddle it wrong...

[A Savage spanke]

ZING!

[Owl]

If you never get married you won't have this problem. 50% of marriages end in divorce; what makes folks think they can beat the odds? You have better chances in Russian roulette!

Just an alternative viewpoint. I like a fair and balanced message board.

[dinan]

You need to start the kids on kayaking training early. It also helps if Boat is one of their first words and they keep taking your paddleing magazines.

http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/photo/Ht ... directlink

http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/photo/Nx ... directlink

[DMG]

Couldn't agree more, David! It's hard work sometimes but I know it's going to pay off big someday.

http://picasaweb.google.com/davemowsgra ... 7534505730

[Paddlegal]

Let's see...

1) Have a job
2) Help with the dishes,
3) Open the door for her
4) Do your share of the laundry
5) Watch the kids so she can go out with her friends
6) Talk with her about something other than paddling
7) Put the kids to bed at night,
8 Don't leave your smelly neoprene in the bathtub for a week
9) Surprise her with a note or card
10) Give her a foot massage at night
11) Go for walks
12) Let her know you want to go paddling more than 12 hours in advance so she can plan for it.
13) Don't put the kayak on the car rack when you're going to her grandmother's funeral.

It's all give and take. If you give a little, you can take a lot of kayaking, snowboarding and climbing trips.

BDD

p.s. When you want that new boat, let her buy something expensive first, then she'll let you get whatever you want. The extra money is worth the peace and harmony.

There's your good advice buddy, and I'll add my .02 cents as a woman.

Do what SHE likes to do 50% of the time. I know it will probably cut out 50% of your paddling, but...isn't that fair?

[michelle Ashford]

I am a paddler too, so it's hard for me to imagine that she would NOT like paddling! lol But anyway, I am divorced (before my paddling days) and i was with a guy for 3 years (we DID paddle together), but now i am by myself and don't have a "paddling partner" anymore. But it seems that women usually just want to feel more important than anything else. Maybe alternate? Start doing things SHE likes to do when you can't go paddling and let her know that you are interested in some of the things she likes so that maybe she will be more open to YOUR interests. Quid pro Quo...you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours...you show an interest in my things, and i will show an interest in yours...don't know if that will help, but if it doesn't... I am a Counselor, I don't charge for paddlers!!! lol
Good luck friend!...Peace. Michelle Ashford

[bmartin]

First comes a girlfriend and you make her feel special and you might even paddle together. Marriage comes along and now you have to check in on a full time basis but if you coordinate things well you can still hit a lot of water, especially if your wife has some of her own activities where each of you get some me time. Of course if you didn't marry for money, looks, or some other non-paddling attribute and marry someone like Renee the me time is we time on the water and you have hit paddling nirvana.

I wish I could tell you that I could paddle whenever the water hits after I had kiddos, but you know that isn't in the cards if your a committed parent. When I had young kids, I have 3 teen boys, it just meant that I didn't get many kitchen passes (me time). Plain and simple it was a lot of work, very rewarding work, but it took an enormous investment to raise kids, especially when they were young. Like others have said, I took'm with as soon as they were old enough to participate in some of my activities, which brought me more kitchen passes. Yes that might mean I might not get to participate at the level that I might have liked (ie paddling Buffalo, Caddo, etc instead of the Tot), but I got out there and look foundly back at those times. Now that my kids are teens, Dad is not nearly as cool to hang with. I will say the hour to hour time commitments get easier as the kids get older, but I have my share of soccer,football, swimming etc. practices and games, but once they got that drivers license, I find that I get a lot more kithcen passes. That drivers license is that proverbial light at the end of the tunnel and one great thing about this sport, I see guys much older than me, hitting water that I will probably never be good enough to run. I know I will probably have more me time than I care for in a few years.

So how did I stay married with kids and paddle? I recreated some, but not nearly as much. Just cherish those days when you do get to paddle and enjoy your kids. I know it is a cliche, but they do grow up fast and I do no regret the sacrifices I made to see them turn into young men. I am more proud of their acccomplishments than any river I have conquered.

[bmartin]

"Of course if you didn't marry for money, looks, or some other non-paddling attribute and marry someone like Renee the me time is we time on the water and you have hit paddling nirvana."

Ohhh Mannn....., this may not have come out like I meant. Renee you have plenty of non-paddling attributes ....Scott is a lucky guy.

[Paddlegal]

"Of course if you didn't marry for money, looks, or some other non-paddling attribute and marry someone like Renee the me time is we time on the water and you have hit paddling nirvana."

Ohhh Mannn....., this may not have come out like I meant. Renee you have plenty of non-paddling attributes ....Scott is a lucky guy.

Oh, I'm not so sure you insulted Renee, being associated with Nirvana kinda makes one a goddess, doesn't it Renee? Make it rain, will ya honey?

[Shark Attack]

Paddleing with a spouse is always an event. You need to teach your spouse a lesson every once in a while. If they start whinning and griping too much, you just let them out on a gravel bar & leave it up to them to get to the take out.

After 25 years of marraige I've realized that some of my greatest adventures have been walking back to the truck

Wes

[Paddlegal]

Paddleing with a spouse is always an event. You need to teach your spouse a lesson every once in a while. If they start whinning and griping too much, you just let them out on a gravel bar & leave it up to them to get to the take out.

After 25 years of marraige I've realized that some of my greatest adventures have been walking back to the truck

Wes

This discussion is how to KEEP you spouse, wes.

[sggrant323]

find a single lady on this forum from the get-go, then you won't have that problem. i think.

[KAYAKN]

I guess my biggest problems has been wanting to paddle bigger water than the Caddo or Ouachita. So i have been more about "me time". I have taking the kids camping once this year and even took them on a raft ride down the Caddo. Maybe thats not enough river time for them? I dont know? They really have a great time in the outdoors, there smiles are huge and very warming!!! Maybe i have been paddling to much? I love my family very much and i love hanging with friends on the river. Man oh Man the river's have some awesome power of drawing one near to them!! I finally got to run Baker but i would much rather be paddling with my wife and kids on the Caddo. I guess its up to me, do i paddle more so that one day i can run some big crap or do i paddle more with the family so one day i can be ??????? What the hell kind of comment is that?? Ofcouse i want to spend more time with the family. I hope my wife and I can work through this. If Life was rated like the rivers are i wonder what class it would be???? Thanks all of you for giving me your thoughs and pm's. I hope to have the girls at RP this summer tearing it up