How do you stay married with kids and paddle??

[JTarver]

Ok, I got this one. Here are my specs: Work full time, school full time ( no online stuff either, all physically have to be there classes ), 2 kids, one only a year old, and i work on the side landscaping as well.
Yea..it's bewildering, to say the least.

Annoy the living hell out of her.

Constantly. Pick at her..but lovingly...and just be downright irritating. She will be soo happy to get a reprieve from you for a day or so...that paddling won't be an issue anymore. It will be more like a reward to her. You just have to find a woman who will put up with 24/6 annoying. Or 24/3 if you get a really wet week in like this one.

If that doesn't work ( I am a gifted annoyer, I can teach you though. ) then you need to find something she can enjoy too like the others said. Either that, or if she has girlfriends you can talk her into starting up a sewing club, knitting circle, or movie night..some sort of girls night out thing so that she isn't bored and feels like you're getting to have all the fun while she babysits all the time. Most married people with kids, have other married friends..with kids. The girls can bring the kids along, and whatever unfortunate father that doesn't paddle in tow with them, and you get to go out and have real fun, minus the guilt factor.

I promise you, the guilt factor weighs heavily on me when it comes to my kiddos..but I try to take (at least one of them for now) paddling with me when it's something he can handle being 6. My daughter is the one I am betting is going to be fearless. I would LOVE to have her paddling the Tot with me in 8 years or so. Nick and Hunter have a great thing there.

Anyway, be creative with it. Like I said, coax her into starting some sort of group things with friends..and it will open up alot of doors for you.

My two cents. I'd like change though. :shock:
Joe

[Big Daddy D]

Let's see...

1) Have a job
2) Help with the dishes,
3) Open the door for her
4) Do your share of the laundry
5) Watch the kids so she can go out with her friends
6) Talk with her about something other than paddling
7) Put the kids to bed at night,
8 Don't leave your smelly neoprene in the bathtub for a week
9) Surprise her with a note or card
10) Give her a foot massage at night
11) Go for walks
12) Let her know you want to go paddling more than 12 hours in advance so she can plan for it.
13) Don't put the kayak on the car rack when you're going to her grandmother's funeral.

It's all give and take. If you give a little, you can take a lot of kayaking, snowboarding and climbing trips.

BDD

p.s. When you want that new boat, let her buy something expensive first, then she'll let you get whatever you want. The extra money is worth the peace and harmony.

[Fish]

Big Daddy, I was with you up till number 12.

- Fish

[gannon311]

this has been helpful .i have wanted to ask this ? many time but my wifey does read posts sometimes.RAININ LIKE HELL IN BIRDTOWN

[Jody]

I do enjoy paddling and like to go when the weather is nice and such. I also understand that Grant's main passion is paddling and that does not intimidate me or make me feel like I am second best. He has a wonderfully healthy hobby that he truly loves. A helluva lot better than him feeling the need to go to the strip club 4 nights a week. hahahhah

Each individual should have a life of their own, independent of their spouse. If your partner is too dependent on you, I would encourage more autonomy and for them to develop ways to spend their time independent of you.

Balance. Autonomy. Trust.

[KAYAKN]

coax her into starting some sort of group things with friends..and it will open up alot of doors for you.

[Fish]

Now that is funny.

[KAYAKN]

1) Have a job
2) Help with the dishes,
3) Open the door for her
4) Do your share of the laundry
5) Watch the kids so she can go out with her friends
6) Talk with her about something other than paddling
7) Put the kids to bed at night,
8 Don't leave your smelly neoprene in the bathtub for a week
9) Surprise her with a note or card
10) Give her a foot massage at night
11) Go for walks
12) Let her know you want to go paddling more than 12 hours in advance so she can plan for it.
13) Don't put the kayak on the car rack when you're going to her grandmother's funeral.

Do all of this and;
14. two hours of home work every night.
15. 1.5 hours of cheer practice three times a week
16. 1 hour of tennis practice once a week
17. cook dinner(sometimes)
18. Bought here some double, well you know what i mean
19. put up with a completely nutty mother-n-law
20. She's alive, for now

[Big Daddy D]

Yes, you can let soccer and volleyball and cheerleading fill up every night and weekend of your life. We decided several years ago that the kids get two seasons of the year for them and then the other two seasons are left open for the family. No more of the year-round, play every sport thing.

Sounds like you're feeling out of balance. You and your wife have to decide how much is enough and how much is too much. The kids shouldn't expect to do their activities for 52 Saturdays a year, nor should you expect to get to paddle 52 weekends a year.

Talking with her at moment when both of you are calm will do more good than venting on the ACC page. Or you can stop by Big Daddy's Marital Counseling Booth at FIBARK this year.

[Big Daddy D]

Big Daddy, I was with you up till number 12.

- Fish

Typo. That 1 wasn't supposed to be in there. 2 hours notice.

[Roger]

Find a partner who likes to do the same things and raise the chilluns to do the same thing.


This edition of Simple Answers to Difficult Questions brought to you by Mr. Knownothing .

[Allen Rittman]

Treat her bad enough during the week so she does not want you around on the weekends. Find a new GF or Wife. No i'm just kidding, my wife love the outdoors. So long as she can watch it from the couch. I have never been able to get here to go much. It has to be 90 degrees. Well guess what there is no and I mean no water when its 90 degrees. So I pay 150 a nigh to stay at Ozark Bluff Dwellers a night. It's a great view and very confy. Do like I do just go by yourself. I spend 3 or 4 days at a time on the buffalo and she is always glad to see me when I get back!!!

She tried to change you, don't try changing her!!!

Renne is a very rare catch, I still want to meet her sister!!!

[Boofaholic]

No kids to speak of(knock on wood)but w/ my wife she only seems to get pissed if Im paddlin and she isnt.In these cases it serves me well to stay out of her way until her thirst for h2o has also been quenched! Also it seems to be easier to get away w/ if I dont give any trip report and instead ask all about her day!However it seems hard to obey big daddys rule # 6,that one always seems to get me!Also #13 seems DEAD on!

[canoe]

Dr dale does not cook or do dishes he works his a** off taking care of folks i do the rest want long maried advice pm it will be 36 years april 21

[cdl]

Sent a pm
Cindy L.